hafta/wanna

I've never really been one to just slack off completely, but I've noticed my fair share of people who give up before they even start. I always wondered, why are you doing this to yourself? You could do so much more. In high school, you don't really seem to care what happens academically until the very last year, and once that last year comes, it's either too late, or you have senioritus and don't want to participate in anything. You start thinking about the future, grimacing at all the decisions you have to make and all the paperwork you have to fill out.
I was contacted right before my sophomore year of high school by one of the tennis coaches at Cal. Lutheran University. It wasn't allowed yet to start recruitment, but I wrote back anyways. I started thinking way to hard about college, and the future, and I was just a sophomore, what was I supposed to know? How was I supposed to know what I wanted to major in? Then my junior year, all the emails and letters and phone calls started filing in, and it was even WORSE. My parents asked me constantly, "Did you reply to that coach from that college yet?" No, mom. Thanks for reminding me that my future is calling though. I didn't want to deal with it. But I think it helped me with starting sooner, and getting athletic scholarships before anyone ever did. And it pushed me to do what every student didn't want to do until the very last minute. It feels better now because I've narrowed down the colleges I want to go to.
I think that once graduation hits, everyone will be ready to go to college. I know I'm ready right now. There's no point to high school anymore, I feel, except to go to prom and wear the cap and gown and all that senior crap. I DON'T CARE JUST GET ME OUT OF HERE.

Launch/Draft

• What am I passionate about?  What do I want to do?
• How can I use the tools from last semester (and the Internet in general)?
• What will I need to do in order to "feel the awesomeness with no regrets" by June?
• What will impress/convince others (both in my life and in my field)?
• How will I move beyond 'What If' and take this from idea --> reality?
• Who will be the peers, public, and experts in my personal learning network?

Most people who know me would expect me to say that I am passionate about tennis. This is not true. Being passionate about something to me means that it's just so important to you that you can't picture yourself without it. I am actually really passionate about writing. I really like words, and putting my thoughts into something that people can understand and relate to, because everyone is just looking for words that make them feel less alone in the world. That's why I read. I relate to the words, and I feel understood by the author. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be doing to become what I want to be, but I think I want to be some sort of writer, maybe even a photographer for a magazine. That would make me so happy. It's ridiculous that I want to do these things, because I've been confused for the longest time with what I want to do when I get older.

The tools from last semester, such as the essays we wrote, and our vocabulary lists could both be extremely helpful in writing. I write practically every day, I just don't tell anyone. So sh.

To "feel the awesomeness", I'll just need to do anything to get an A. A's always make me feel like I did everything correctly.

I think just letting people read the things I write down could convince people that I can write and write things that are relatable to others. That's all writing is really about, to me. Writing what could make other people feel understood in their heads, because that's all anyone really wants. Is to be understood.

Well, I definitely DON'T want anyone to read anything I write down. But I think that some of the essays I write are decent enough to show to people to get to where I want to be.

Not sure what this means, but my friends will probably be the ones I ever let read my words, so they'll be the critics of it all.

Lit terms 5

Parallelism: the principle in sentence structure that states elements of equal function should have equal form.

Parody:  an imitation of mimicking of a composition or of the style of a well-known artist. 

Pathos:  the ability in literature to call forth feelings of pity, compassion, and/or sadness.

Pedantry: a display of learning for its own sake.

Personification: a figure of speech attributing human qualities to inanimate objects or abstract ideas.

Plot: a plan or scheme to accomplish a purpose.

Poignant:  eliciting sorrow or sentiment.

Point of View: the physical point from which the observer views what he is describing.

Postmodernism: literature characterized by experimentation, irony, nontraditional forms, multiple meanings, playfulness and a blurred boundary between real and imaginary.

Prose:  the ordinary form of spoken and written language; language that does not have a regular rhyme pattern.

Protagonist: the central character in a work of fiction; opposes antagonist.

Pun: play on words; the humorous use of a word emphasizing different meanings or applications.

Purpose: the intended result wished by an author.

Realism:  writing about the ordinary aspects of life in a straight forward manner to reflect life as it actually is.

Refrain:  a phrase or verse recurring at intervals in a poem or song; chorus.

Requiem:  any chant, dirge, hymn, or musical service for the dead.

Resolution: point in a literary work at which the chief dramatic complication is worked out; denouement.

Restatement: idea repeated for emphasis.

Rhetoric: use of language, both written and verbal in order to persuade.

Rhetorical Question: question suggesting its own answer or not requiring an answer; used in argument or persuasion.

Rising Action: plot build up, caused by conflict and complications, advancement towards climax.

Romanticism:  movement in western culture beginning in the eighteenth and peaking in the nineteenth century as a revolt against Classicism; imagination was valued over reason and fact.

Satire:  ridicules or condemns the weakness and wrong doings of individuals, groups, institutions, or humanity in general.

Scansion: the analysis of verse in terms of meter.

Setting: the time and place in which events in a short story, novel, play, or narrative poem occur.

Lecture notes

Dickens:

•romanticism

-doubleness of character

-"streaky bacon": the author combines sentiment and humor

•subject matter

•themes/tones 

Heller (Catch 22)

•Postmodernism: used humor

<WAR

-hopeless despair

-humor

•narrative structure

•diction/syntax

A catch-22 is that you need money to go to college, but you need to go to college to get money. 

Quote:

"Moral was deteriorating and it was all Yossarian's fault. The country was in peril; he was jeopardizing his traditional rights of freedom and independence by daring to exercise them."

•quite ironic in the second half of the sentence

Lecture notes

Dickens:

•romanticism

-doubleness of character

-"streaky bacon"

•subject matter

•themes/tones 

Heller (Catch 22)

•Postmodernism

<WAR

-hopeless despair

-humor

•narrative structure

•diction/syntax

lit terms 4

Interior monologue: A piece of writing expressing a character's inner thoughts

Inversion: When the normal order of words is reversed in order to achieve a particular effect of emphasis 

Juxtaposition: When two or more ideas, places, characters, and their actions are placed side by side in a narrative or poem for compare and contrast

Lyric: A type of poetry that explores the poets personal interpretation of and feelings about the world

Magical realism: A literal genre or style that incorporates fantastic or mythical elements into otherwise realistic fiction 

Metaphor (extended, controlling, & mixed):

Extended: a metaphor that is extended or develops as far as te author wants to take it

Controlling: a symbolic story in which the real meaning is not directly put across the whole poem

Mixed: a metaphor that has gotten out of control and mixes it's terms so they are visually imaginatively incompatible

Metonymy: A word that is used to stand for something else that it has attributes for or is associated with

Modernism: rejection of 19th century traditions 

Monologue: A dramatic soliloquy 

Mood: The atmosphere of the story

Motif: object or idea that repeats itself through the literary piece 

Myth: A story dealing with supernatural beings or heroes 

Narrative: A collection of events that tells a story either through telling or writing

Narrator: One who tells a story

Naturalism: A literary movement seeking to depict life as accurately as possible

Novelette/novella: An extended fictional prose narrative that is longer than a short story but not quite a novel

Omniscient point of view: When the reader is seeing and all knowing 

Onomatopoeia: Words that sound like what they mean

Ex: Pop!

Oxymoron: A phrase composed of opposites; a contradiction

Pacing: The way the author speeds up or slows down the story

Parable: A story that instructs

Paradox: A statement that seems to contradict itself, but on closer inspection, it does

Literature Analysis #4: Siddhartha by Herman Hesse

Plot:
Siddhartha and his friend Govinda are on a journey to discover themselves and become Samanas, and then they end up meeting the Buddha. The two friends end up splitting- Govinda learning from the Buddha, Siddhartha learning from life and himself.
After crossing the river and meeting the Ferryman, he met Kamala, who taught him about love. They conceived a child together. He became unhappy with his new turned lifestyle of gambling, so he left and went back to the river where he planned to give up on everything. He discovered what he had been looking for after this incident, and after a while, he became the new ferryman. He soon learned of Kamala's being bitten by a snake, and once she died he took their son, who in turn ended up running away.
Siddhartha came across Govinda for the third time, and taught him many things. He became the Buddha himself.

Theme:
The central theme that I picked up on was freedom. Not the kind of freedom where you can do anything that you want to do and not get in trouble for it, but freedom of the mind. The kind of freedom where you can think or feel anything and be at complete peace with yourself. That is what Siddhartha felt, he felt complete peace and freedom in himself.

Tone:
The tone of this novel is simple, yet elevated in the meaning of the words said. The tone is somewhat carefree, but serious.

Literary Techniques:

• irony: Govinda protected Siddhartha from a snake and Kamala was killed by one.
• foreshadowing: Siddhartha's meeting with Kamala. (pg 81)
• rhetorical question: "Often I have thought: will Govinda ever take a step without me, from his own conviction?" (pg 30)
• parallelism: "He has not grown wiser, he has not gained knowledge, he has not climbed any higher." (pg 17)
• alliteration: "And Siddhartha said softly, as if speaking to himself..." (pg 16)
• personification: "a smile crept over his face" (pg 390)
• diction: simple. "It has no difficulties." (pg 58)
• imagery: "There was a tree on the river bank, a coconut tree. Siddhartha leaned against it, placed his arm around the trunk and looked down into the green water which flowed beneath him." (pg 88)
• characterization: "with his lofty brow, his king-like eyes and his slim figure." (pg 4)
• symbolism: the river. Peace. "He looked down and was completely filled with a desire to let himself go and be submerged in the water." (pg 88)

Characterization:
On page four of the novel, Siddhartha was described twice using direct characterization. "...strong, handsome, supple-limbed... king-like eyes and slim figure." Indirectly he described Govinda (best friend) as loyal to Siddhartha. The author used both approaches so as not so overuse the direct characterization; to leave more up to the imagination for the other characters. Herman Hesse used the same diction and syntax in the book as when he described characters- simple and to the point. Siddhartha is a round character, I think. At least, compared to the other characters he is. He is described intricately physically, and we can hear his thoughts. He changed throughout the novel, so he was a dynamic character. Upon finishing the book, I felt like I was reading about myself. His thoughts were so precise sometimes and easy to connect to. "He delighted and made everybody happy. But Siddhartha himself was not happy."